Ten wrong but oh-so-good reasons to wear the hijab

You cannot see my haaaaaiiir, nahnahnhanhanaaaaaah!

You cannot see my haaaaaiiir, nahnahnhanhanaaaaaah!

*You will never experience bad hairdays again.
*Your hair will not get stuck in your lipgloss even if it’s windy.
*If you live in the West, you will almost always get the double bus seat for yourself.
*No need to worry about rain, your hijab will look just as good.
*Don’t worry about that extra bump. Your hijabified clothes will do the job concealing it…
*You can pull a Britney on your hair, and nobody will ever notice and think you are crazy!
*In case of emergency, you can try to use your hijab as a parachute. 
*You will save a lot of money by not having to use hairspray, hairmousse or hairgel.                                   
*If you dye your hair, and the result turns out somehow unexpected, you can still run to the closest store to buy a remedy for it.
*You don’t have to worry about brushing your hair or spending valuable time fixing it in the morning.

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21 thoughts on “Ten wrong but oh-so-good reasons to wear the hijab

  1. Amelita says:

    Haha, these are funny!

  2. Arabista says:

    Hehehe…so true!

  3. fantasticalicious says:

    Another good reason is that if you are smacked around because the men in your culture decide you aren’t modest enough, you can use the hijab as a bandage

    If they hit you in the head or face, you can just wear a viel to conceal it

    Oh, and one more…..wearing a hijab (or even better a burqa) will help you to identify with those women who are forced to wear a hijab or a burqa and it will help to bring you all together so you can talk about how to cope with your force marriages and how your husband are allowed to have 4 wives and you can only have one husband and all the oppressive and sexist ordeals you must deal with because it’s all a part of your culture.

    OH oh oh…just one more! Maybe you can also use your hijabs to tie up those women who decide to leave Islam. That would save them from being executed for leaving it, wouldn’t it? You could stuff your hijab in their mouth so that they don’t tell everyone that they want to leave Islam and end up getting executed for it.

    PS – I have a question for you. If Islam is so great then why is the only exit strategy from it execution & isolation?

    • songs about daisy says:

      I am so tired of bigots who know little to nothing about Islam but all they’ve been told by websites or Orientalist books. I’m a Western, Caucasian Muslim – yes, we exist and no, I wasn’t forced into it, I have converted and am unmarried (due to choice, yes, Islam promotes my fellow sisters have it) – where are your evidence to all of these things you’re saying? Could you provide it for me? As a Muslim and a woman I am allowed to ask for it. We are actually told that we need to seek knowledge and ask questions, if you stop texting things out of context and read the whole of the Qu’ran instead of wiki-ing some of these so-called facts than maybe you’d know that. If you’re going to back it up with stats about certain cultures than think about it, hey. Islam is different from the culture. A culture that was contorted after colonialism came in and changed the faces of these countries. The countries that allowed women rights before any other. I say go to Malaysia and Turkey to experience the beauty of Islam. I’m sure you’ve never met a Muslim in your life or you’d know different.

      Oh, also, our men can’t hit us on our faces because it dehumanizes us, like you just did. Thanks for being a human being with no decency. Knowledge is power, acquire some.

      As for my fellow sisters and fellow human beings reading this I am sorry for this rant. I just converted and CHOSE to wear the hijab because honestly, I do because I love it. I have experienced this kind of nonsense from people around me – thankfully, not all of them – but I am not as strong as the Prophet, peace be upon him, and could not hold my tongue on that comment.

  4. Celeritas says:

    If its cold you can keep your head warm.

  5. Habayeb says:

    parachute? lol thts too scary to think :-S
    their actually not the reason but their for sure the benefits lol.

  6. basbousa says:

    Wow, fantasticalicious, that was kind of harsh.. You sure don’t know any women wearing hijab. We are as free as the bird, and MOST of us chose to wear hijab/niqab ourselves. I feel sorry for your ignorance, really.

    I wish I could spend one day with you, you would probably learn more about Islam and muslims than you have learnt and will learn for the rest of your life. And it would be really worth it. We’ll learn about each others, and learn to understand and respect. Isn’t that much better than to assume?!?

  7. Habayeb says:

    fantasticalicious is an anoder example of “wat the media can do to you”

  8. Amelita says:

    fantasticalicious – I’m not a muslim myself, and it’s embarracing to see how ignorant some non-muslims like me can be. Get out of home and learn about the real world. Read some books, travel a little, seek information from objective sources, and you will understand what I’m talking about. Everything you read, hear and see on TV isn’t true.

  9. Hmmm. As if white guys in the West don’t beat their wives??? Why is it just “Muslm Men” that get the bad rap for wife abuse? I grew up watching my own white non-Muslim daddy beating the snot out of my white non-Muslim mum … and then, there were all of my white non-Muslim Aunts getting the snot beat out of *them* by their husbands as well… So I guess if I use fantasticalicious’s logic I could say that wearing big sunglasses and big floppy hats is a good way to hide the bruises that are the result of the cultural abuse of women in the West?? And then maybe we white non-Muslim Western women can trade stories and hide-the-bruise tips with our abused Muslim women friends? Oh yeah, and if the West is soooo great, why is it that so many abused white Western women get ostricized or downright murdered when they try to leave their abusive white Western husbands?? Hmmm. Call me crazy but I think “wife abuse” is not the sole property of any one culture, religion, or country but instead the filthy act of beating wives is, sadly, a world-wide shame. Scarves, veils, or not… some women the world over are beat by some husbands ~ not just MUSLIM husbands.

  10. basbousa says:

    Coffee Catholic – It’s sad, but you are so right. Abuse has no religion, but sadly it’s found in every corner of the world. Thank you for your comment.

  11. naeemah says:

    I loved this post! It’s sad about that ‘f’ person, I guess he/she didn’t have the heart to post a reply after the responses made….but I just have to say..just b/c a woman CHOOSES (yea, CHOOSES hun!) to wear a hijab/niqab, that doesn’t mean she was forced or is oppressed. Please learn a little before you go making such false statements.

  12. loolt says:

    *If you live in the West, you will almost always get the double bus seat for yourself
    not at all actually–well not in england anyway 🙂

    *You will save a lot of money by not having to use hairspray, hairmousse or hairgel.
    i spend more money on my scarves than i ever do/did on my hair 🙂

    *If you dye your hair, and the result turns out somehow unexpected, you can still run to the closest store to buy a remedy for it.

    … or simply indulge ur passion of having purple hair– havent done it–yet 😉

    *You don’t have to worry about brushing your hair or spending valuable time fixing it in the morning.

    I disagree on the brushing bit– i believe in looking good ‘for yourself’. So I always make sure my hair is tat free 🙂

  13. Slainna says:

    I’m not a Muslim myself, but I do see a lot of Muslim ladies at work (I’m a cashier), and many of them are very stylish. Inspired by them, I found this site while doing a search on Muslim fashion/clothing, looking for skirts actually. (I generally prefer fairly modest clothing for various reasons, and long skirts look elegant.) While it’s not what I was looking for (I would like to buy some ankle-length skirts), many of the outfits on this site are gorgeous.

    Where do you find long skirts, anyways? I’m 5’9″ with a 33″ inseam in pants, so all the skirts I buy that are “supposed” to be ankle length end up, on me, tea length or shorter, which I just do not like as much. If you read this, could you make some recommendations?

  14. […] And for non-Muslim travellers resistant to adapting to local styles, check out Basbousa’s Ten Wrong But Oh So Good Reasons To Wear The Hijab! Funny. […]

  15. misterbean says:

    Muslims! It’s very important to present the hijab as a choice initially. Then, after a few years during which we’ll get used to seeing the hijab in public, you’ll be safely able to pressurise women into wearing it, even if they don’t want to.

  16. basbousa says:

    Mister Bean; I feel sorry for you. You seem to have a big problem understanding the world around you.

    Hijab is a choice for most of us. I feel sorry that you are so narrow minded

  17. Melda says:

    rotflmho!!! too funny 😛

  18. Chrissy says:

    Christian here, and after many years (11) of attempting abstinence until marriage WITH the awairness of alot of the premarital stuff, I can say that to combat the many modes of seduction, symbols of modesty such as the head covering are soooo important. Alot of the time U.S. women are taught to just copy the media and seduce without realizing that there are consiquences to these normalized actions. I like Mary’s veil for this reason and thus fear for the little girls growing up under the example of Britany Spears (esp. if they have no other guiding voice).
    If you are a Christian, I highly dought that you will consider the symbolic meanings in your own religious art and in your own religious text, but I hope and pray that someday you let that imagery stretch the brain just a smidge.
    Yes though, freedom to veil and freedom not to veil ought to be equally important freedoms.

  19. Chrissy says:

    I think that it was Wolsencraft who said, ” I don’t want to control women, but rather to grant them the capacity to control themselves”. (.. or something to that effect.) – A Vindication for Women’s Rights

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